Now, try sex with a twist!

Bored with your sex life? Well, then sensate-focused sex is the name of the game for you.

The nice, slow lovemaking where all you do is focus on your sensations, is the new mantra to renew your sex life as you rediscover each other. Sensate-focused sex exercises involve a series of behavioural practices, which offer variety and increased personal awareness through basic touch.

Originally developed by sex researchers Drs. William Masters and Virginia Johnson, sensate focus exercises involve each partner paying increased attention to their own sensations when stimulated.

Particularly for couples in sex therapy, the exercises have helped lovers to overcome issues like performance anxiety, rapid ejaculation, lack of orgasm and erectile dysfunction.

The benefits of sensate focus include, discovering new types of touch, spine-tingling sensations, increased comfort with physical intimacy, better awareness of your lover's body, as well as your own.

Apart from these, going for such exercises can help couples to strengthen their relationship, and also guarantees no fear of failure, better sex communication, and heightened sexual excitement.

With such non-demands and pleasuring exercises, couples do not make sex goal-oriented, instead, they enjoy the experience of being with one another, touching and feeling each other's bodies.

These highly structured touch activities are about enjoying physical contact to the fullest without trying to arouse each other and should not be mistaken as a form of foreplay, because it is the main experience in itself.

Done in several stages over time, they are tailor-made to a couple's specific issues when working with a sex therapist, reports Fox News.

Couples in therapy are usually advised to abstain from having intercourse while focusing on the physical sensations triggered during sensate play.

This not only alleviates anxiety and mental distractions that lead to sexual difficulties, but also offer up a greater awareness of the wide range of stimuli that encompass all of the senses.

The rules for sensate focus sex are:

1. Breasts and genitals are off limits for the first few sessions.

2. Verbal feedback is limited unless you're uncomfortable or in pain.

3. Do not try to elicit sexual response (but don't sweat it if it happens).

4. After each session, be sure to process the experience.

When pursuing sensate focus exercises, set aside at least 60 uninterrupted minutes in a warm bedroom and one may even enhance the setting with soothing music and candles.

If it helps, take a bath (or anything else that relaxes you). Take your time, over several "dates," and finally get on with the sessions.
Sensate focus sex could establish new ways of relating to each other and partners may find themselves having some of the best sex of their lives.

The details of sensate focus sex make part of the book ' Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots , by Dr. Yvonne K. Fulbright, who is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc.Sensate focus sex could establish new ways of relating to each other and partners may find themselves having some of the best sex of their lives.

The details of sensate focus sex make part of the book ' Touch Me There! A Hands-On Guide to Your Orgasmic Hot Spots , by Dr. Yvonne K. Fulbright, who is a sex educator, relationship expert, columnist and founder of Sexuality Source Inc.

Anal sex how dangerous is it?

Me and my husband recently decided to experiment in our sex life, so we decided to give anal sex a try. We've done it twice and the second time wasn't as painful as the first. But now I am scared to death. I am afraid I've done something really wrong. I've been in alot of pain recently. I went to my doctor and told him that i was in alot of pain and did not know why. (I was too embarrased to tell him what i had done). He thought maybe I was just constipated and gave me some stool softner. Hoping that he was right I just agreed and took the medication. My bowel movements are fine but the pain proceeds. He did think that this problem was around my colon area because when he touched the right side of my abdomin it was excrutiating. He informed me that my colon was in that area. I am really nervous, I don't know how dangerous this could be but it's starting to hurt to even walk. Does anyone know?? Could it be a bad infection or something?? Please someone respond this is so embarrasing I don't want to talk to anyone face to face.

There are several complications to anal sex: Pain from hemorrhoids. Hemorrhoids can be fragile and prone to bleeding, although they don't usually cause the kind of pain you've described. You can frequently feel a hemorrhoid as a swollen, tender lump in the anal area. You'll often notice blood from a bleeding hemorrhoid on toilet paper after a bowel movement, or on the stool itself.

Pain and bleeding can also occur when there's a small tear in the lining of the anus called an anal fissure. Even small fissures can be pretty painful because they often cause spasms of the opening of the anus. They heal slowly because they're irritated repeatedly during bowel movements. With anal fissures, you may also see blood on toilet paper or on the stool itself.

A rare, but serious, complication after anal sex is a hole (perforation) in the colon. This dangerous problem requires hospitalization, surgery to repair the hole, and antibiotics to prevent infection. A colonic perforation will usually cause fever and severe pain and pressure in the abdomen. This condition requires immediate medical attention, either through your health care provider or your local hospital emergency department.

Sexually transmitted diseases can infect the anus in much the same way as vaginal intercouse.

My advice to you if you do not have fever and the pain is somewhat bearable, is to take an colic pain killer, a stool softner for a couple of days. If you do not improve then you will have to consult someone face to face and you may even need a scope exam. A surgeon would be best at evaluating this condition.

Problems with oral and anal sex

Well, I’m glad that our advice has helped you defeat premature ejaculation.

Yes, it is true that very occasionally a woman is allergic to her partner's semen. Symptoms are soreness, redness and swelling of the sex organs. But I know of no other ill effects from contact with seminal fluid.

Your next question is about fellatio. This is harmless, unless either party is carrying a sex infection.

But in the rare instance of a woman being allergic to her man's sperm, fellatio would probably cause swelling, soreness and redness in the throat.

Next, you ask about anal sex. We don't really recommend this - but there's no doubt that these days a lot of couples happily practise it – and that it has become much more popular in the last few years.

1. passing on of infection (if one of you has one).
2. damage to the woman's anus (especially if you're rough).
3. spread of germs from anus to vagina (if you have vaginal sex immediately afterwards).
4. possible urinary infection in the man (very uncommon).